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Showing posts with label white hair. Show all posts
Showing posts with label white hair. Show all posts

Saturday, February 8, 2014

To Gray or Not to Gray?



Being a model helps
A fashion trend is emerging, at least in New York City,  and it’s one I’m not comfortable with.
Yet.
Just as it became de rigeur for New York City men to wear black, black, and more black, a la Steve Jobs, it’s now white, white, and more white for women.
I’m talking hair.
I have two New Yorker friends who have joyfully stopped coloring their hair.  And the initial shock of arriving in town and seeing them au naturel is fading for me. They actually look pretty youthful, despite their hair. Or maybe I am seeing past their coiffes, in the way you do at a high school reunion, when after awhile your mind’s eye sees your old friends the way they once were.
Last night, at a dinner party, a woman whose hair is finally just growing back after chemotherapy, took off the gray manicured wig she was wearing.
I tried it on.
“You look good,” my husband said.  Dashing to a mirror, I didn’t recognize myself.
Was he just being polite? Or – as the guys at dinner said – “Think of the money  you’ll save!”
I hadn’t planned on writing about this major life transition that arguably should be easier to make once you’ve left your career. But an essay in today’s Wall St. Journal reinforced the queasiness of this decision, even for a woman’s spouse.
When his wife (who must live in New York) asked him if she should go gray, Rob Lazebnik writes that he had visions of being “married to the Queen of England.”
Helen Mirren as Queen Elizabeth

He pondered his discomfort, concluding that “society, sadly, deems old as unattractive, and that for some reason gray equals old more in women than in men.”
Congresswomen are not gray.
Women newscasters are not gray.
And no way did he really want his wife to go (old and) gray, though he couldn’t come out and say it.
After thinking about how to respond to her, he eventually “dropped a bomb, one that I knew would strike deep inside the bunker.” He told her: “You know, I remember when I met your mother and thought to myself what a great-looking gray-haired lady she was.”

Yeah. I’m not going to rush out to look like my mother for a little while longer. But then, I don’t live in New York.